Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Field of Dreams

What are your dreams? What are my dreams? What are God’s dreams? What are God’s dreams for me? How does He communicate those dreams?

God seems to communicate with me in themes and this has been the theme for this season. There are 3 media sources that have touched my heart in this matter: the film “Field of Dreams” with Kevin Costner, the book “Captivating” by John & Stasi Eldredge, & the Gospel of Luke 21:34. All 3 of these sources have been “poking” at the very core of my being & bringing into the light what has been stolen from depth of me & that God would want to redeem & restore…
A Field of Dreams
Not just one dream or desire but a whole field of hopes, & passions that were deposited within me long before my parents even knew I was to be.

Last week I was drawn to Luke 21:34 “Watch out! Don’t let your hearts be dulled by carousing & drunkenness & by the worries of this life.”

Not that I have ever been prone to carousing or drunkenness but the worries of this world have definitely dulled the sensitivity of my heart to the fullness of life that Christ died for. I became aware of how many of my decisions, choices, even ways of relating with people have been altered for the sake of “safety”, “fear” of what might happen, or heart that has been so dulled by the bumps & bruises of life that it has forgotten how to believe, hope, & trust. Though some people may think that I’m an adventurous or even a risk taker type person, my ability or even my desire to hear the voice of the Lord to step out in faith has/had been hampered by life’s experiences.

“Captivating” has been revealing, highlighting, & healing those areas that have been so deeply ravaged for most of my life. I realized today that I started stuffing/hiding my dreams for myself sometime around 2 or 3 years of age. I have a picture of myself as a Princess at 1.5 playing with my Grandfather that I keep in my Bible. I had a counselor ask me once what was the significance of that picture & I didn’t really have an answer. I know now that it is because it is proof of my femininity & all the hopes and dreams that went with it. By the time I started school, I had learned that being a girl was not practical, nor was it safe. Today I saw just how “Happy” my Heavenly Father is that I am His Princess! And that He wants to revive the dreams of the Princess within me. It is a bit scary, unfamiliar, but exciting & freeing at the same time.

“Field of Dreams”… “If you build it he will come” The still small voice of the Lord’s guidance that seems ridiculous, illogical and in some ways suicidal to this world’s way of thinking. In the film Costner, tears up a large part of his corn field to build a lighted, baseball diamond because he hears a “voice”. This same “voice” leads him on a wild goose chase that eventually leads him home where his broken relationship with his father is healed & what was a crazy idea was redeemed. Like Costner I need to risk it all to trust the “voice”, the still small voice of my Loving Father, who will take me down a path that will bring healing, restoration, & fruitfulness when the world would say it isn’t possible.

So today, I’m choosing to build a new “Field of Dreams” within my heart. Risking it all to follow the voice of my Heavenly Father, trusting Him, & expecting Him to surprise me with great gifts that uncover the deepest longings of my heart. A Field of All the Dreams I Have Yet to Dream.